the little triggers...do you see them? February 1, 2015 16:33
Its Sunday and I am sitting on the couch with a blanket and some furry paws velcroed to my side leg and the snow is falling a little swiftly and I am thinking....TRIGGERS... It has nothing to do with my environment currently but everything to do with being aware when you are going through tough times. I am so loving my new transition in life and currently my blog that I am developing here as we speak. I find it freeing to put down into words what we have learned in the past and living in the future.
Triggers....do you know what they are?? Do you know what I am talking about? This isn't about Halloween or ghost stories, this is about the things that you suffer from emotionally and sometimes physically for some people. It's about recognizing why you react or feel the way you do when you are in discomfort, sadness, FEAR. When you can recognize that you are seeing a TRIGGER then you just say to yourself simply, "it's just a trigger" and then you take care of yourself gently and forgive yourself for having that thought or feeling versus turning to food, or reacting emotionally and saying something you wish you never said.
About two or three years ago I finally recognized the TRIGGERS and look at them in a whole new light now. I look at them as positive messages, or signs that oh..its just a trigger and then I just move through the day so much more smoothly...
So let me give you some examples...A few years back an older friend was telling me, or rather talking to me about her daughter. And, I've heard this story many many times and I guess that day it just turned into a trigger...but let me explain more in detail. She had been going on and on in her victim mode of being such a great mother, and provided for her and this and that, all material things she did for her daughter but did she love her conditionally or unconditionally ? Did she tell her how blessed she was to be her mother or how proud she was of her and how far she has come? Did she tell her anything about her greatness instead of about her own thoughts of me me me...or what a chore it was to raise her? NO! So it kind of raised a TRIGGER in me and I decided to voice my own thoughts and be that daughter that wanted to respond and defend that hurt soul. I wanted to defend her because I too needed to defend my own. Judgement growing up and being constantly reminded of all the things you didn't do does not reap happy souls, it teaches us to defend ourselves and put those walls around us...
It didn't go over well but the moral of the story is...TRIGGERS...its all just triggers and when you can realize that when dealing with your own daily life and having these moments of feeling weak, fearful or sad, just say to yourself "its just a trigger" of my own relationship with my mother and I don't wish you any harm or whatever you are dealing with its a trigger of something that hurt you in your past. Let me tell you, I have made it my mission to teach when I'm seeing people struggle with the stories they keep telling themselves and when they see that it is a trigger of the past they are more open to letting it past and letting it go
"...Be gentle with yourself, you are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here ..."
desiderata